Four Agreements: Domestication Part 2

1) Describe your image of perfection. What would you look like? What type of personality would you have? My image of perfection is someone who looks good in both the "art teacher" style and dressed up. 20 lbs lighter. No more acne, a little bit of muscle, and I know how to do my hair and makeup. Personality wise? I'd like to be less anxious. But other than that, I think my personality is pretty nice. My anxiety gets me into trouble a lot. 2) What would I have to change about myself to live up to this image? Honestly, not much. I am getting better about taking care of myself and I am trying each day to recover physically. I know I can do a better job of turning to proteins, fruits and veggies instead of carbs. Also, I am trying to treat my skin a little bit better than before, but lately I've been falling asleep with my makeup on. I think getting back into the habit of taking off my makeup and showering when I get home will go a long way. Also, personality wise, I am challanging my anxious thoughts and trying to notice my stress. 3) Am I willing to make these changes? I want to say yes. But often when it comes to doing something "good for me" vs doing something "easy/feels good" it can be hard. 4) Is it humanly possible for me to attain this image of perfection? Yes and no. Yes, I can do all these things, but even when I had them, I was still unsatisfied. 5) What is my image of perfection for other people in my life? "My image for my partner(s) are" Kent- to be clean and tidy. To put everything in a good place for him to remember. To ask me out on dates and be curious about me and my needs, and fulfil them. Ben- to want to go and do things with me a little more often (not be afraid of leaving the house) to not interrupt me as much, or be so sad sometimes "My image of perfection for my parents are" Mom- to apologise, accept her part in it, be curious about how to support me. To stop infantalizing me, or undermining my accomplishments, my decisions. To give me the respect I deserve as an adult. To stop trying to force relationships onto me. Papa- to talk to me more often. To express more things, more deeply. To be curious about my life. To say he's sorry for landing me in the middle of his fights with my mom. To finally drop his hatred of her. "My image of perfection for my best friend is" someone who believes she deserves a good partner, someone who can ask for help. 6) What social masks do you wear around others? Sometimes I wear a very silly mask, a jokester or a bit of a pervert. Sometimes I'm very adult, serious, reserved. 7) "I wear these masks because..." I dont trust other people not to hurt me. 8) What would it be like if I took these masks off? I could get hurt. I could get into a confrontation. I could hurt others. 9) What would it be like to express who I really am? Scary at first, and then stressful, but finally freeing. 10) 1-10 on the authenticity scale I reside at: a 7 or 8 11) List four new agreements you can make with yourself that will honor who I really am: -I will speak up clearly when I want something -I will say no plainly and without excuse to things that will take up my time -I will use precise language to communicate and not be vague -I will not hide who and what I am from others

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